Monday, January 29, 2007

The Ex Reflex

I was blog-hoppin' the other day when I came upon this very interesting lady blogger and decided to re-post one of her works. I can totally relate to her that's why..

I can't help but think of an ex. The One that haunts my dreams. I wouldn't exaggerate if I dare call him "The One That Got Away." Heavy huh? Yes, I was hopelessly swept off my feet with this one. The typical "eligible bachelor" of Manila's sin City. But being true to my nature, I was on self-destruct mode within the last few months we were together. I guess I can't blame him for giving up. I didn't know how to battle my demons then. I was young, "living the life" and didn't know when to step on the brakes. As it turns out, I went straight ahead and ended that path with a head-on collision. The damage? My heart broken to a million pieces. The surgeon is still looking for a way to put all of it back together so it can function normally.

I didn't know any better. And if I could turn back time, I would make it up to him. But in a city where every other girl is almost a model, of course he found a pretty face to keep him company almost instantaneously. It hurt my ego and so I let him go. To this day, I think of him still. I dissect the whole relationship and try to take comfort in his flaws. When that doesn't help (it usually doesn't), I think of ways on how I can just erase him from memory. But after 3 years of my mind easily drifting back to his handsome face, well. You can imagine I'm in for a battle. To the point wherein I think it's already a reflex reaction for me to think of him. Lonely night... check. No one to talk to... check. Reminiscing happy days? Check. There you have it. The EX REFLEX. It doesn't help that we're friends and I text him still. Even though I've already had another boyfriend since that ex (we broke up already though), I still find his voice soothing to my ears. So yes I am guilty of drunk dialing too. And how convenient for me that he's still single and he still entertains me. Somebody shoot meh! Please.

Come on girls, aren't we all at times guilty on this? ;)

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