COMPLETE!!

I wanna learn a new language. I wanna finish my Master’s degree. I wanna collect different breeds of small dogs. I wanna be a published writer. I wanna meet the right one. I wanna be….COMPLETE!!

Hahaha!! That’s the best intro I can give you for giving you my KR Travelogue!! YES!! It’s finally complete!! 30 installments that’s about 6 months in the making!!! 30 INSTALLMENTS, oh my goodness!! Does it feel great???!!! Oh gosh, you just don’t know how psyched I am seeing it printed in paper. Geese, I speak like it’s already published as a book. Ahahaha!!!

But even if it’s not a published one, I still consider it my first book. :) If it’s not obvious (hehe), I worked bloody days and nights for this and I finally understood what it’s like when they say “Is this the feeling of being a tormented artist?” There were times when I’m already about to sleep but as soon as I thought of a catchy introduction or how to go about a post, I can’t help but just get up, grab a pen or open the PC and do the transferring of the idea, whatever means just to take it off my mind. Aaargh!! There were also times when I want to write but had to stop because I feel down and I think that I can’t deliver the proper emotions in the story (specially the Samuel part ^^).
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So is that really it?? Do I already have the makings of being an author someday?? Ahahaha!! I kid, I kid. I know I’ve lots of things yet to learn but surely this is just the first step. Ayt?? You know how they also say that first book of the authors are often their autobiography?? Well, I’m not proud of my “not-so-many” booboos here (haha!!) but hey it’s what really happened. =P If I will really turn this book into reality then I have to you know, introduce more characters here, create a short history of the protagonist in the intro, a dish of conflict there but the BESTEST of all, orchestrate a happy ending for KC and Samuel. Ahahaha!!! *dreamy eyes* Wouldn’t it be great?? Ahahaha!!!

For now, here’s the unfinished material. Still with grammar errors I suppose (despite my repeated revisions ;-). Just giving you the chance to catch up on segments you might missed. Haha. See what’s best in here is that, when you started on say 1a (The 4-Hr Ride), there’s already a hyperlink that will lead you to the next part. :D Uhmm, it only took me an hour to do that. Tedious, tedious I know but hey, it’s for the love of the readers. Hahaha!! So without further ado, I give you my KR Travelogue ;-)

1a: That 4-Hour Ride
2a: A Gurly Prologue
2b: Miss Smarty Pants
2c: A Hearty Dinner
3a: Mission Is Possible
3b: The Director’s Cut
3c: Series of Conversations
3d: If You Wanna Be Famous
4a: Samsung
4b: Miss Congeniality
4c: The Korean Toast
4d: It’s All About Samuel
4e: A Night With the Boys
4f: Firsts
5a: Goodbye Gumi-Si
5b: Here We Are, Everland
5c: The Thrilling Rides :P
5d: Hey Jealousy!
5e: Last Encounters
5f: Penniless in the Streets of Seoul
5g: Roller Coaster of Emotions
5h: The Conversationalist, Bow!!
6a: An Early Morning Debate
6b: Change of Plan
6c: A Before Sunrise Moment
6d: Turn-Around
6e: This Kiss, This Kiss
6f: Famous Last Words
6g: B-L-O-O-P-E-R-S!!
6h: Joie de Vivre

I printed the papers and my golly, they almost reached 50 pages I think. Tsk, tsk, abuse of company supplies. Ahahaha!! I wonder how thick would my book be should I ever produce one - coz this is like a 6-day coverage only. ^^ I’m planning to submit the papers to uhmm, some of my respected friends with such such prolific talent in writing way way way better than me. (*cough cough Sam/Lisa/Xiela**). Hahaha!! Wait for the copies on your desks. Ahahaha!!


So I guess this is already my cue to thank some persons. This shall go to my Acknowledgement section. Ahahaha, the cheek of me even mentioning Acknowledgement. Haha!! But really thanks to my constant readers in Multiply (Tyts, Sam, Pam, Lester, chibodygal^^, losttreasures, Raf, Klein and if there are some that I forgot to mention). Well, it’s not really constant like they’ve read all segments but mostly I think whenever they would catch it ^^. Blogspot would have to be everyone since unlike Multiply I can't keep track of who's who but special thanks to Will and Kevin for the comments, hehe. Thanks a bunch also to my hardcopy reader since she's so lazy to read in her PC – my friend Angela. Haha!! I'm also grateful for reading this book "The Other Side of the Story" by Marian Keyes since this material gave me an idea on the process of publishing books. It's such a shame that I got it 50 off the mark on a bookstore sale when it is such a wonderful read. ^^ Of course, some lines inspired also by authors Kinsella/Dam/Peterson and Weisberger. ^^

Just for laugh trips, try clicking on 1a and bookmark it for future hilarity. Haha!! :D And as usual, comments will be much appreciated. XoXo

My Favorite Class :)

Body jam version 45 was just released two weeks ago. :) I like the current mix, it has a bit of a rock song (who would’ve thought that a rock song would be justified with such a nice choreo?), Janet Jackson’s Feedback (love it!!!) and was it reggae?? Oh gosh, I’m poor when it comes to classification of music. Pardon. Hihi. Apologies also for the lame shot below. :P

Sorry for being so enthusiastic about it. It’s just that I always thought that singing was my first love. I still remember this composition I made when I was in high school. It commences with something like, “Some people were born with silver spoon in their mouth; I’d say I came out of my mother’s womb with a microphone in my hand.” (Ssshheeshh, how the hell did I come up with such hyperbole??) I don’t even remember the gist or even the purpose of that something, the only thing that made impact until now was the introduction. Haha!!

That was how passionate I was about singing. (-,-) But lately when there had been no uhmm, practice, (Haha! Oh how I still hold contempt for my uncle for taking away our videoke machine when he moved residence. By the way, the machine was originally “HIS” it was just positioned in our living room because he knows I use it atleast once a week. That’s why I call it “OURS” :P) atleast I have another something to express myself into. And with the tri-weekly attendance, I’ve come to loving the craft even more. Haha! :P

It’s also nice meeting these dance instructors – persons who are very passionate about dancing. I don’t think I will be ever be as good as them someday. :P When I was young, I was never really that priviledged to take up some lessons that would enhance my talents. I wish Mam enrolled me for a voice lessons instead of the keyboards (which I wasn't able to finish :C). So you can just imagine how thick it was for me joining singing contests inside the school premises, ahaha!!I But since I'm paying for this one although it's not really meant to be enhancing talents, I want to make it my goal to be really good at it. Someday, someday. Haha!! Yeah as I was saying about the instructors sorry I got sidetracked :P, it was also my first time to develop a crush for this pretty instructor, she has a nice body and dances oh so gracefully. Too bad she just visits during launches. Uhmm, I know you all know that I’m single for years now but hey I don’t have lesbian tendencies. LOL.

My favorite part aside from the waist gyrating (during hearbeat slowdown that's usually in the beat of Shakira's, Gwen Stefani's or Rihanna's :P) is the climax portion where you finally combine all the movements and do it repetitively that you just end up panting due to the fatigue. Like you just wanna head back home crawling. Haha!! Oh, how good the benefits are for the body. Haha!! :D

Another nice thing about this class is of course, meeting new classmates/friends. Meet Cathy. This girl is a doll – such a sweetie!! Like I always tell her, she’s a walking Ms. Friendship and all that’s lacking is a sash. :P For someone like her who clearly belongs to the upper level of the society, it’s astonishing that she befriends everyone specially commoners like me. :P

Now I’ve been inviting girlfriends to join me. Hopefully, Allen will come next week and calling out Xiela and the rest (haha!!). Gurls I guarantee you it would be fun, fun, fun. ÜÜÜ

My Social Life Is Slowly Returning

Ain’t that a good sign?? ;-P

After a Saturday movie with a girlfriend, here’s another one. A Monday dinner with Lisa @ Portico, Serendra. :)

The meeting was kind of “pilit” (forced, haha!!) since the GCs we acquired from the Blogger’s tour two months ago were about to expire. And you think we’re that luxurious to spend our own dough for a girls’ catch-up there?? Haha!! :P

Food: Mixed grill and Chicken Fussilli. Yum, yum, yum.

this is sooo not Blogger's Tour :P

Thing that I can’t understand is why on occasions like this, bloopers still exist. God, why can't they just leave me alone?? Everything was fine (my uproarious laughter is an exception, it's always a wa-poise moment :P) until for the last part when we’re about to pay the bill and the GCs slipped under the couch. Aaargh!! But of course, someone has to do it. Unfortunately, it should be the one with the longer limbs!! In my MNG dress!!! Blast these genes!!! LOL.

A night of chikas, chikas and more chikas!! LOL. And I’m impressed!!! Lisa’s impersonating skills are improving. Hahaha!!!

The walk after dinner while checking out the shops there felt kinda liberating. For once, I broke that monotonous routine of MWF overtime then go straight to the gym to de-stress!! Thankfully, there are still GCs for other restaus. ;-) So yup, there’s definitely a next time.

Meanwhile, check this out. Gym effect or is it just the phone??

Hmmmmmmmmm, interesting!! :P

Mama Mia, Here I Go Again

Because watching a movie with someone is such an accomplishment for me, might as well blog about it. :P

Mam: San ka punta? (Where are you going?)
Me: Manood ako ng sine. (I’m going to see a movie.)
Mam: Sino kasama mo? (Who are you going out with?)
Me: Si Allen, ka-opisina ko dati sa Intel. (Allen, an officemate before from Intel.)
Mam - Nonchalant face.

Something bout Mam’s reaction is frightening – this in line with the thought that Allen is generally a guy’s name. It’s either she’s thinking letter A. My daughter needs to get out with a guy sometimes. She’s not getting any younger. Really, it’s scary that she’s not threatened that Allen might be a guy!! Or letter B. She’s been working for some Saturdays now; I think she badly needs a life. Either case is really terrifying!!

Some people are not really keen on musical, me either. But there’s something with Lisa’s and Allen’s excitement on the said movie. So with my free passes, might as well go for it. And Mama Mia, I enjoyed it. :D

So yeah, it would’ve been really nice if it’s a get together for the 3 of us. Since the lead women are all set of threes in the movie, but then someone’s been MIA-ing on me lately, hehehe. Ahem. :P Betcha she’s gonna react here. :P

Anyways, I’ve been MIA-ing on this girl also and I felt ashamed that I was only remotely available in her lowest times. You all know her; remember the phone call in Samsung Soul event?? ;-) Mama Mia! It’s such a surprise seeing her at her best!! :) I was kind of expecting the opposite. She came in her nicest red dress and accessories. :) Fabulous!! It was one of the best tips I gave her whenever she calls, GO AHEAD AND PRETTIFY YOURSELF!! :P She obediently followed this, succumbing to “retail therapy” every week that it even came to the attention of her Mom. So I was like, “Geese, no wonder my Mam never questions me about it.” I mean, I can’t imagine her asking me same question for 4 years. :D

On that 30 mins coffee time while waiting for the movie, we tried to cram in as much as gossip as possible. :D I heard about Fely’s engagement. Aww dear hope you’re reading this, my felicitations to you. I’m really happy for you. :)

Allen: May nakasabay ako kanina sa MRT. From PE siya eh, letter M ang name nya eh.
Me: Ha. Sino?
She gave further descriptions.
Me: Ah c Alex!!
Mama Mia, letter M daw. Hahaha!!

We stopped by the bookstore first since we can’t be admitted yet inside the cinema. I’m not yet a book fan during the time we were at Intel but I now am and the sweet girl surprisingly bought me a book as a token of appreciation. Sweets!! :)

Wall-E, another movie to watch out for

Now for my piece on the movie:

1. I love the venue of the shoot - a beautiful Island in Greece. :)
2. Pierce Brosnan still looks hot. :P
3. I still can’t get over Meryl Streep’s role as a loving mother. Visions of her in a suit still haunt me from the movie The Devil Wears Prada. :P
4. I love the wedding gown of the young girl.
5. I was deeply moved in one and only one scene. The Winner Takes It All moment. =,(

I was trying really hard to compose myself knowing that hey, there’s a girl beside me who just came from a heartbreak. But I wasn’t able to help it. The song is again one of those oldies that I’m familiar with but ironically, that’s the only time I realized its meaning. That never ending lesson in life of how some love are not really meant to be. Unfair but really, just like in the song “the rules must be obeyed.” Sad, sad, sad. Sniff, sniff, sniff. Tears were already pooling in my eyes at the very start of the chorus. I guess you can say I’m one of the world’s strongest women huh?? On a positive note, I now have one new song to try in videoke machines. :P

Dinner was spent in Burgoo – a unanimous choice since we both haven’t tried it there. Might as well make it memorable, right?? Service is not really bad, I mean the waiting time but they have this paper table cloth where you can doodle while waiting for the food. So here’s our end product, nyahaha!! Mama Mia, I’m such a poor artist. A simple pig!!! What the?!?! Ahahaha!!! Atleast Allen tried to sketch the lead girl Sophie in the movie. Wahaha!!

Food was served instantly. We tried the glorious ribs and again, my favorite seafood pasta.

Yet another one of those memorable convo,

Me: San nga ba nakatira c Joan dati?? Letter T yun eh.
Allen: Tanza?
Me: Hindi.
Allen: Tierra?
Me: Aaah!! Noveleta!!
Thigh-slapping laughter. Letter T daw. Wahaha!!! Oh dear, whatever happened to our memory??? Ahaha!!

It’s almost 9 PM when we finished. I was supposed to go to another friend’s house but it was already late. Yes, she’s from a heartbreak also. Geese, whatever happened to love yo?!?! Where is the love?? People killing people dying…ok, ok,ok enough. LOL. Well atleast it’s still working for others like the engagement I mentioned above. Coz if not, Mama Mia, I don’t know where else to get the hope from. *Sigh*

KR Travelogue Day6g: Joie de Vivre

In the split-seconds it took me to rush towards the counter, half-dozen scenarios already raced through my mind. Like what?? Like these:

1. Like how certain I was that my flight is yet at 10 PM. I can still vividly recall that day when I was deciding for the time of my flight home, bending over Rose’s table (our secretary or more commonly called admin) and choosing among the list of flights posted in her table. I chose the last one for the day since I can’t take the earliest flight due to waking up early problems. Really, I’m too young even for an early onset of Alzheimer’s right??
2. The phone call from Dien this morning. Like how we were so sure last night that our flight is of the same time and agreed that we’ll go to the airport together but he called up this morning and apologized for not going with us (Esther, Samuel and I) since he just checked that his flight is at 8 PM. It could’ve been a sign – a divine intervention even- for me to go and check mine, but I simply ignored it!! How careless could I be??
3. The smash-up of the bus a while ago and how it really was foreboding of a disaster.
4. Mental note to self: 1st thing to do when you reach the airport is to check the status of your flight on those huge boards that display the schedule. I don’t know what it was called but you all know that, they’re the first thing you see when you watch Final Destination. Well, not that it would matter even if I did that.
5. WHAT ABOUT MY SHOPPING??????????????????????????????????????
6. The rule of thumb – check in 2 hours before the flight. 2 NAFFING HOURS before the flight. Aaarrrrrrrrrrrggggghhhhhhhhh!!!!!

And now it’s about 13 mins left before my flight, I was at the counter trying my best to give an imploring, beseeching look in the lady infront of me. She became jittery also as soon as I handed her my e-ticket, frantically jabbing away in her keyboards in the same pace that her head moves left and right, probably in disbelief on how I could have been so late for my flight.

Times like this, I have to hand it to her. I’m thankful that she’s not the reprimanding type or the blaming type who bombards you with questions like what did you do, why were you late for the trip blah blah blah. Perhaps she do acknowledges that situations like this DO happen and I can feel that she’s trying her best to help me. Until she looked up from her PC and dropped the gauntlet,

“I’m sorry, I can’t let you in.”

And the weird thing was, I didn’t become afraid. It was only the time when my stiffened back had the chance to relax. I was able to breathe properly for the first time ever since the inspector asked me to hurry up. Instead of being caught in the throes of “Oh no, this is not happening to me. Surely, I will wake up in my bed hugging my Tweety bolster pillow right?”, I was already thinking about going back to the hotel. Already, I can see myself sharing tonight with Esther’s bedroom coz I’m sure she wouldn’t mind. Really, I’ve made peace with this situation and I was already excited about spending tomorrow with Samuel on whatever cultural places it is that he hasn’t visited yet. Weird, weird, weird. It almost seemed surreal that I didn’t care about the folks at home. No guy has ever had this effect on me. No one!!

But when I was back on materializing the plan of going back to the hotel, sanity has got the better of me. The very thought of going back alone, I mean, how would I do that?? I don’t know how to. My phone’s off, how would I tell everyone that they can’t expect me tonight?? I went back to the counter and talked to the lady.

“Miss, can you try again?”

Again, I’m thankful that she didn’t react as though I just asked to donate one of her limbs to science. Instead, she obediently made a quick phone call and after more jabbing in her keyboards.

“Okay, but you must promise me that you’ll hurry alright?” She went back to the phone and probably gave instruction that a “very important stupid person” (haha!) came very late and you all must wait for her. Geese, I can already picture the scenario – all the irritated passengers looking at me as I enter the cabin. Yay!!

“Yes, yes!” I replied, nodding just like a child that will be finally given a marshmallow after numerous stated conditions.

“Are your liquids all in here?” She asked as she takes my suitcase.

“Ah, yes, yes.” Whew!!

After instructing me on the gate and my seat, I turned to my heel running as fast as I can towards the hand carry inspection area. I quickly placed all my items and boots in the tray and lined up for security check. I didn’t know that even trench coats would have to be removed and I cringed as I remember that I’m wearing a black short-sleeved top. My white thermal wear will be exposed!!! But clearly this is no time to be minding petty situations like this; I took off my coat and steeled myself for the shocked reactions of those behind the queue. Oh the dread. The horrible, awful, dready dread!!

I already broke a sweat by the time I stepped off from the inspection platform and the first thing I grabbed from the tray was of course my trench coat. Enough humiliation!! Without even buttoning it, I replaced my boots on and clutched the rest of my items. Back to Forrest Gump mode. I wasn’t far from the counter when somebody called after me. I turned around to see one lady guard gasping for breath as she hand me one of the shopping bags that I left in the tray. Oh my goodness. I thanked her and scurried away.

I ran and ran until there was no more breath left of me. Huff, huff, huff. My gosh, a very wide airport can also have its advantages too right?? The only time I slowed down was when I saw the boarding gate and the people are still lining up to be admitted. Whew!! Thank heavens!! No irate passenger will welcome me. Phew!!

I briefly composed myself as I enter the plane. When I showed the boarding pass to the cabin crew, she motioned me to go upstairs.

Huh? May second floor ang eroplano?? (There’s a second floor to an airplane?) I asked myself. When I saw the stairs, I was like “WOW, COOL!!”

When I was looking for my couch, I almost want to hug the lady in the check-in section when I learned that she granted me the window side seat!! Due to the urgency and craziness of the situation earlier (of course it’s so thick of me to even choose my seat) but I just remembered that I was not even able to say thanks to her. My bad!! But really, she’s a star!! If only there’s a paper here in the plane for commending employees, I would definitely vote for her. :)

I saw an old man seated comfortably in my couch. NO, he can’t steal it away from me. Had I only known that time that it’s a different class I was at, I could’ve just willingly given him mine. I mean, really, he looks rich enough to afford such class. But since I’m a moron during that time (haha!), I talked to the cabin crew to verify my seat. The old man transferred downstairs. :P

I slumped myself on the couch, so relieved from getting away with all this. I was back reflecting what has just transpired and that’s the only time it all sunk in. Muntik na ako!! I almost missed my flight, my goodness!! ALMOST!! I couldn’t help a quick conceptualization of what if I really missed it. Number 1, my phone is simply, totally and utterly drained - how do I contact my family, my boss and more importantly, the travel agency!! Number 2, how do I exactly travel back to Shilla Hotel?? For the life of me, I don’t think I can do it alone in a foreign land!! Number 3 and the most unbearable of all – if I missed my flight, must I spend for the replacement ticket that will take me home?? *Gasp* I’m not going to waste my money on that!!

And yet, and yet, I reacted as though everything was just fine and dandy - that the solution will just be a piece of cake. Goodness, whatever happened to me??? It’s as if my brain had lost its capacity for a coherent thought. I’ve just gone bonkers because of a guy - one special guy. My heart sank as the plane took off signaling my final goodbye to him. :( Truly, I left my heart in Seoul. :(

My thoughts were distracted by the airline crew, a friendly old man offering me up a wine. A wine?? Wait a sec, I took the same airline for my departing flight five days ago but there weren’t any wine offered to me then. Clearly, I was still out of clue during this time. Gosh, my brain isn’t still functioning.

Even though he was a bit insistent on me trying it, of course I had to beg off since I’m no wine person. Instead I just took the mini snacks and delved in my bag for that book I purchased solely for this trip. The entire marathon I did for today took its toll on my legs so I studied the buttons in my right armrest to give me a comfortable position while reading. To my astonishment, the number of buttons here is quite many for the standard ones I use to know. So for full 5 minutes I was there studying the buttons and experimenting on the couch like it was a mini robot. Haha!! AMAZING!! I loved the fact that each part of the couch can be bent, retracted, extended, elongated, forwarded to your heart’s desires…EVERYTHING. Haha!! Even the couch – it’s quite bigger from the one used to seat on. Hmm. That’s the only time it dawned on me that this is not soo econo class, not econo class. Moron, moron. I’m such a moron. :P Why didn’t I realize it early on??

I can’t help but sing along Fergie’s line, “Flying first class, up in the sky. Poppin’ champagne, livin’ the life. In the fast lane, I won’t change by the G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S!!, oh the flossy, flossy” Haha. Joie de vivre. Despite the debacle that happened a while ago, who would’ve thought something good will still come out of it?? For four hours, I just enjoyed the benefits of the upgrade – delicious meal, yummy desserts and picture-taking (surreptitiously, ssshhh!!! Haha!).

Surely you don’t wanna hear stories from NAIA coz it will just get on your nerves as much as it did to me. Such a shame that I had to borrow the taxi driver’s phone just to insert my SIM and make a phone call to Mam around 1 AM.

It broke my heart for not being able to produce something for Pap and Mam from my suitcase when I reached home so I just promised them I’ll take the family out for a dinner on Sunday. There’s still work the next day so after the quick night routine, I was beside Mam (y’all know how my room was a mess even before the trip right??) holding my camera and already reminiscing on memories with Samuel. Cripes!! Haha!! I was just staring into that oh-so-handsome hombre that I’ll probably never ever meet again. :( I was startled with a voice from behind,

“Sino yan?” My mother asked. Geese, how long has she been staring at me???

“Ha? Si Samuel. Ang gwapo noh?” Oh boy, I’ve never talked about a guy that way to my Mam.

She nodded.

She hasn’t met him and I think she already likes him. Yay!!

-END-

KR Travelogue Day6f: B-L-O-O-P-E-R-S!!!

Allow me to start this section by listing all of my bloopers in this trip:

1. Excitedly wearing my thermal and winter wear while yet in the Phils – that I was practically sweating in the airport. Geese!!
2. Bringing three phones but only 1 one of them is CDMA capable and is working in Korea. (Am I really an engineer?? Hahaha)
3. Splurging on some flat skiing boots that will just be worn once for this trip when in fact it wasn’t of any use at all. Hay.
4. Forgetting to bring some party appropriate outfit for some post training clubbing. Tsk!!
5. Ditching my thermal wear in Everland thinking that I would brave the cold because I survived the night before in just a tank top and a coat. The aftermath?? Oh, I only got sick after taking about four rides. Duh?!?!
6. Not exchanging enough money in the airport during the 1st day thinking that I will find money exchangers in the province. IN THE PROVINCE, my goodness what was I thinking?? I wasn’t able to shop when we had a chance in the city due to again, language barrier.
7. And when I already had shedloads of money, I exchanged my one whole day of shopping for spending some time with a guy. Silly, silly me. But okay yeah I did learn some wonderful cultures. :P

Of course I didn’t realize all of these while I was on the bus en route to the airport. Instead, I focused on composing words to send to Samuel to relieve me and my asinine act just a while ago. Aaaaarrrrgghhh!!!! When I took out the phone, I had another thing to add to the list above - forgetting to charge my one and only working phone. My SGH-U700 battery indicator is already blinking by the time I produced it from my bag. Arse, arse, arse!!!

“Hi Samuel! Esther told me about the awkward beso we had a while ago. I’m so sorry it’s just that in our country we’re used to doing it only in one cheek. I hope you enjoy the rest of your stay there in Seoul. Take care.:) ” I’m supposed to go for the umlaut (Ü) but unfortunately this phone doesn’t support it.

Short but sweet. There, I let my thumbs do the talking, painstakingly hitting the number keys until the letter come up and at the same time praying that the phone still has enough charge for me to read Samuel’s reply. If he would, that is. BUT HE DID!! The phone vibrated, rocketing my adrenaline levels.

“Oh I’m sorry also I forget there are only countries that do that?? Did you already leave? In that case, have a safe flight home and maybe see you in the next conference. Kisses, Samuel.”

KISSES!! He said kisses, ahahaha!!! My extremely exhausted face turned into one goofy smiling mush. Hahahaha.

Right after that my phone burst into a riot of colors signaling a signing off. Oh great!! How will I let Mam know later that I already arrived?? Aaaaaaarrrggggh!!! But ‘s ok. Samuel said kisses and it already meant so much to me - like, he’s so sweet no?? Gosh, I’m so shallow. Ahahaha!! I wasn’t even expecting a reply from him – this is just utter bliss. Ü I’m gonna keep this text forever, ahahaha!!! :D

The bus is going to drop by two more hotels and by the time the driver finished his round-up, only three of us all women will be the passengers for the trip to Incheon. Colleagues back in the Phils told me to leave early since traffic is pretty bad in Seoul. Well, even if the bus arrived 15 mins late (6:05 PM) I’m sure that with a 10PM flight, I’ve ample time to do a bit shopping later and another mistake (to be included in the list above) – fix my luggage. I haven’t really segregated my hand carry you know, I meant the liquid and all that. This morning, I was just stuffing things up into my black shiny tote all in a hurry to meet Samuel downstairs. Shheeeesh, utter crazy effects when I’m fancying a guy!! The slow movements of the bus made me realize that they were right back at home and through the thick evening traffic I felt my eyes droop and give way to slumber. ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

About 30 mins later,

BBLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!

We Filipinos use to joke about it saying “Maniniwala na sana ako eh kaso may sound effects pa.” Translation: Geese, you don’t really have to put some special sound effects coz I’m going to believe you. Hahaha. But really, I needed that to show how much the impact.

Aaaargghhh!! I fell from my seat with my knees on the ground when the bus abruptly halted from hitting a corner, my shopping plastic bags all scattered on the floor. Ouch, it was a hard fall!! I expect my knees to stain violet anytime later. While the driver is apologizing, I stood up clutching my shopping bags and turned around only to realize – and to my utter mortification - that the two girls are looking at me. Yes, they were awaken by the smash-up but they’re still sitting very posh in their seats (one even had an LV tote on, so classy) and seemed completely unfazed just because they’re wearing their seatbelts on. BLOODY SEATBELTS, my goodness gracious!! Haven’t I learned this lesson from INTEL??? We used to have shuttle bus inspectors checking that everybody has worn their seatbelts before leaving. As they say, safety always comes first. KC, you bananahead!!! Hehehe.

As I return to my seat and this time fasten my seatbelt, I was visited with a bad feeling – a presentiment of a disaster to come. But I was just extremely pooped to even think about it. I simply shrugged it off and in no minute I was again out like a light. Zzzzzzzz.

Finally we made it to Incheon around 7:30 PM and it was really nice seeing it again. I took the luggage handed to me by the driver and gave him a hefty tip. Nyahahaa, it was just a joke. Not in my wildest dreams. :P

Ok. First things first. I’ve got to segregate the liquids in my hand carry. I thought of doing it in the comfort rooms but when I saw the empty chairs – that row where passengers use to wait – I placed my luggage in it and unlocked it. Gosh, it was quite embarrassing to be doing it there like it’s so not refined and all but hey there were only very few people that time. And besides, I didn’t entirely open it like in a 90 degrees way for the items to be exposed. Instead, I just unzipped a few inches and stuffed my perfume, lip gloss and other liquid cosmetics through the small opening. No need to retouch after touchdown, I’m arriving about 2 AM in the morning. Besides, I’ve no boyfriend to fetch me. Phhbt!! Not that I am kvetching. :P In a whiz of a zip, I’m DONE!!

Next, check-in. I was ambling along the way to the check-in and when I decided that this is my class, stopped to show my ticket to the inspector. He frowned at me and told me that I should check in on the other station. I looked up and geese!! Why do I always get lined up in business class?? KC, do you even know how to read???????????? D’UH!!! What is wrong with me today???

I SWEAR, I SWEAR. I swear black is white that the next time I would definitely, DEFINITELY, read the class I’m going into for check-in. It’s not really that the inspector ashamed me but the last time I did the same mistake in Changi airport, I was looked up and down by a Filipina (who seemed to have married a rich guy) in a scornful way as though saying “Duh, you don’t belong here!” WHAT A PARVENU!! Hmp!!

Moving on, the class where I belong is quite far from where I lined up. Course Incheon is such a huge and wide airport but I felt no need to hurry, I was just taking my time as I schlepped my luggage, my big tote and my shopping bags to the econo class. Yeah, what with my coats and thick winter outfits, I’ve no place for my shopping bags in my luggage. I presented my e-ticket to the inspector with a flourish and waited to be acknowledged. All of a sudden, he returned the envelope to me speaking in Korean which I had zero understanding of and was motioning for me to hurry and proceed to the counter. HUH, WHA, WHY???

I scanned the ticket and it reads:

14DEC07 KOREAN AIR KE623 Airline Reservation
Code:ELDSM4

From: SEOUL INCHEON INT, KOREA Departs:2000 Economy/H Confirmed
REPUBLIC
To: MANILA, PHILIPPINES INTERNATIONAL Arrives: 23:05

I looked up to see the clock and to my near delirious self, it says it’s 7:45 PM!!!

“OH MY GOD. ALAS OTSO ANG FLIGHT KO!!!” (Oh my god, my flight is at 8 PM). I gasped!! The inspector watched me in fascinated horror.

I prayed with every fiber of my being, GOD PLEASE HELP ME!!!

Mustard

Must wear while the color is still in. Yay!! :P

I just realized while I was doing this that all the tops were bought half of what it's originally worth. For reals!! Haha.. Technically, the shoes also since it was bought a lot cheaper in MY - a fact confirmed when I saw the price in one of the stores here. :P I'm such a great buyer.. LOL..

My blog's boring without pics noh?? Haha..Stay tuned for next week's final installment of my KR Travelogue.. =( Then I'll probably work on my SG-MY trip. See yah! :)

Fantastic Willpower

Or lack thereof. Haha. Thanks Wil for that. :P Err, I meant my opening clause and not the thing here. Hehe.

Ladies and gents, my newest baby. Joining my family of hot pink Podie and V3X and pink rose Kodak V803 is my MSI Y2P-S262 in Marguerite Rose. Isn’t she lovely?? Haha!!

If you would recall the last time I blogged about buying something like this was when I bought my iPod a year and 5 months ago. So it must’ve really been a fantastic willpower of holding up for that long. :P I just kept on telling myself that I have the company provided one. But this one has got a better price and I’ve friends who’ve been using theirs for more than a year now so I think this will do. Blogging is definitely better with her around. Hihi. ;)

If you are a keen observer, two more gadget accessories had to be pink as well (haha!!) – the storage card and the mouse. Hehe. And other items in the pic that reflects my personality:

- tweety collector (that's just some of them ;)
- narcissist as represented by my photographs, haha
- pack rat (a collector of just about anything, hehe – perfumes, butterfly stuffs, travel souvenirs, pink gadgets)
- award-winning employee (nyahaha :P)

Speaking of collections, she would be the reason why the pink PSP will have to be on hold for now. UNLESS, some of my richie rich friends out there (yoohoo!!) will uhmm exchange the chokies and perfumes for their pasalubong to me. Haha.

But the most important is the thing that started this all. Like I told you, this all began because of this:

Sigh. Cuando, cuando, cuando????

KR Travelogue Day6e: Famous Last Words

“KC, what happened?” Esther inquired.

Oh my gosh, she’s talking about what has just transpired right?? Gosh, I so don’t want to talk about it. I soooo don’t want to. But what can I do? She was there when it all happened. I just didn’t know exactly where but she was there and she witnessed it all – my utter mortification.
You see, about two minutes away from here Samuel and I was standing outside the Pizza Hut. It was a busy afternoon and we were filled with the hustle and bustle of the street. It was our parting time – time for us to utter our last words. This is it. Time for him to hold my hand tightly and tell me that we’ll meet at this very same place in the very same time exactly five years from now and finally give me that breath-taking, world-stopping kiss. I snapped into reality and realized that, we're so not in Europe and this is sooo not Before Sunrise right?? Haha.

The situation was unbearable. I was looking straight into that very handsome face of his and it was staring back at mine. Come to think of it, I used to stare at and admire it only from afar. Somewhere in the deep recesses of my completely addled brain, the firing synapses were warning me that he was going to kiss me. But it’s hardly possible. I prayed that my key-lime pallor will remain just the same but it’s useless as I already feel myself coloring.

Suddenly, without my meaning to, I turned away from him to look for Esther and use that same time press my lips together to spread what was left of my lip gloss. Just as I was thinking if I'm going to start this whole goodbye thing when suddenly I heard him mutter some things. I turned back to face him and too late for me to understand it all. Instead, the ONLY and LAST words I understood was

“…..it was nice to meet you.”

Before I could conjure up a single syllable to utter, he brushed his right cheek to my left and because I was too shocked (or unprepared I don’t know), I quickly turned around and started walking away. Oh yes I did!! I felt my cheeks flame (really!!!) amidst that 1° cold and my body feels cold all over. It took every ounce of willpower and strength to remain walking upright, to make sure that my mouth had not flopped open or that my knees had just given out. And get this, I didn’t look back anymore.

To keep from passing out or having to actually consider what had just happened, I talked to Esther who’s just surprisingly appeared by my side and I asked her if we can drop by the mall for my quick shopping. She agreed and as if on cue, a chugging taxi appeared infront of us.

Once inside, I faced the windowpane scanning the streets for a sign of Samuel. God, I don’t know what was wrong with me. It was just a simple “beso” – a quick contact of two cheeks and yet I acted like I was a 10-year old girl being kissed by a boy for the first time in her life. Yay!!

Now I feel my heart sank as he’s nowhere to be found on the street. Oh no, what have I done?? It could’ve been a nice ending – a proper one – but instead I ruined it all. =(

“Huh?” I replied. My face must’ve betrayed me for appearing clueless.

“Eh Samuel was about to kiss you on the other cheek but you turned away.”

“Oh my god Esther, I remember in your country you’re used to do it in two cheeks right? Gosh, I don’t know. I wasn’t expecting he’ll give me a beso. I wasn’t prepared for all of it. Did he find the situation awkward?”

“Ah, yes! He asked me what happened to you.” Oh my gosh, now he thinks I’m crazy for scampering off like that. Or yet, another horrible thought gripped me, that the foolish act had just confirmed their vague suspicion that I like him. Now I wished I just melted into the ground.

“No I'm fine. It was just that in our country we’re doing beso only on one cheek.” Yeah that’s it. “Don’t worry I’ll text Samuel and I will explain to him.” There, I’m relieved. I’m so clever in getting away with things. But really, did I have to hide it to Esther?? I mean, come on if I Dien knows the secret then how much more to this woman.

“Esther, I have a question, do you think Samuel has a girlfriend?” And there went the proof of my incurable sickness of kiss and tell. Hay.

“No. He doesn’t have.” WOW!! I was thrilled to hear this!!

“You know my husband looks like Samuel.” Oh wow, I didn’t know she’s already married.

“Really?? He must be a handsome man then.”

But our conversation was cut short when the driver told us that we’re already in Doota mall in Dong Dae Mun. All the way to the mall, I was treasuring this chunk of information that Esther had just told me. Samuel is single!! Hihi. I know it doesn’t make much of an impact specially that there’s a remote chance of us seeing again but still! I’m just happy he’s not romantically attached to anyone.

This is the same mall Dien, Lawrence and I went into last night. I would just probably pick some of the nice stuffs I saw yesterday. Time was of scant supply so I was quickly buying cheap shirts anything that ranges from 10,000 KRW to 15,000 KRW just to have something to give to the folks back at home. I was able to produce six shirts within the round-up of the first floor. We trudged up the second floor to pick anything else for my Mam specially a bag since I don’t know much her preference for clothing and perhaps my promised dress for myself. Sadly there’s none of my taste. No dress for me and no bag for Mam and Tita. It was such a depressing shopping experience. =(

Time must’ve passed quickly what with the traffic and the time Esther and I lost each other when she went to the ladies’ room for it was already 5:15 PM when we reached the Shilla hotel. The bus that’s supposed to take me to Incheon airport will arrive at 5:45 PM. Jaded from all the walking and shopping (not to mention self-embarassing..aargh, I still feel my myself burning with shame, in flames actually everytime I remember the scenario), I expected that Esther would just invite me up for a short rest in her room. I was wrong!! She invited me to take a quick look in the Duty Free shop that’s just beside the hotel.

Oh.my.god. Does she expect herself to finish in say 20 minutes or so to give me some leeway?? My bags are in her room and I realized I’m powerless in the situation. So off we went straight to Duty Free without dropping off our things first. I may have been lacking when it comes to gifts for my parents but I will not waste my money with all the high-end brands here. :P In all fairness there was a Lacoste bag sale but there are a lot of complications when it comes to purchasing items (presenting passport and the like) so I just dropped the idea off. Besides, I still have time in the airport later to buy whatever I can find for Mam.

While traipsing back to the hotel, Esther broached about Nilce and his "boy" Marlowe. She can’t seem to get over with the idea that she’s “sort of” dating him - a guy from the conference. And then she opened up the thing about Brazilian women, like how liberated they are and all that. Gosh, I can’t believe she’s talking to me about her like that. Nilce had been her seatmate and constant companion for the last four days!! I don’t want to think that Esther’s not a genuine person but to be honest, it’s already a general impression on their race.
Ok, I’m not washing my hands on this coz I admit it really scares the pants of me just the mere thought of Samuel and Nilce talking to each other. Hehe. But in all fairness to her, would she help it if say somebody from the class admires her or ok (perhaps with that man working on the same line of thought as ours), if that man wants to have a night with her?? I don’t think that’s her fault anymore. So in defense to Nilce,

“Do you think she’s that type?? She’s just quiet during the training.”

“Well, maybe. But of course, she will not show it to his colleagues.” She countered. Is she trying to convince me to go against the woman??

So to put an end in all this, I provided my impartial account.

“Well at least if she’s really like that, let’s just be thankful that she behaved professionally during the training.” Nilce had been nice to me especially in Everland.

While waiting for the bus outside the hotel, Esther and I talked about some other things. I thanked her for being kind to me and ensured that we’ll communicate in our company’s messenger. It was already past 6 when the bus arrived and when I saw it coming, I gripped Esther’s wrists, faced her and made her promise.

“Esther,” I said pausing for effect “please take care of Samuel for me. Please???”

In any other situation this might sound as a joke but I really meant it. She smiled and said okay.

“Here’s the bus. Oh, I must hug with you.”

For once the words would have struck me comical, but I found her English booboo rather cute. Hehe. We embraced each other and before I walked away, I had one more thing to ask her,

“Esther, I forgot another thing. Please make sure that Samuel stays away from Nilce.”

Ahahahaha. I turned away and climbed up the bus. I waved my hand to her inside and settled myself on the second single seat to the left.

(continue)

Thank You for the Music

I may not be in love right now but I feel like I am ever since I heard this song. I think this was already available about a year ago and I only discovered it last week. I looooove Jinky Vidal's rendition of Tonight I Give In here (and did I say the Teddy too ;-).

Aaah, the kind of song you'd love to listen to when you're just starting a relationship. *Kilig*

Up next is another oldies from Mariah Carey. Of course I listened to it before but I just had the chance to study the lyrics, again, last week. Hehe. The type wherein your heart feels like bursting out with so much love for a person. (This one's not auto-play.)

I dedicate this song to those who are so much in love right now. Yihee!!

While my heart is yet at its "dormant" state (woohoo, i love the term), I'm grateful that these music help my heart recall the beauty of having someone to love.

And again to my azygous girlfriends right now, STEADY lang tayo. Hihi. Our time will come. ;-)

Nostalgia

One night, my younger brother Lem went into my room and showed me his new gadget, a PSP. He told me that he bought the thing to keep him while waiting for shoots and VTRs. He knows me too well to know that I will be delighted not in the PSP itself but in the game he was currently playing – Super Mario. Hehe. Since it was late and I was working on something, I wasn’t able to play with it.

But the other Sunday when power was out for most of the day and there were no other forms of entertainment available, me and my siblings were overjoyed to have something to keep us amused. Haha!! So the three of us were there gathered around in the living room, waiting for each other’s turn in using the gadget. Oh my gosh, I can’t help but be nostalgic at the very scene of us.

It’s the same us when we were still kids gathered around our Nintendo family computer some good 18 years ago. The family computer (as it was called back then) was stationed in the TV in the 2nd floor near the terrace (so the elders watching news downstairs won't be disturbed). Haha!! And I was beyond thrilled to learn that most of the games we were playing during that time are STILL ALIVE. How were they able to preserve it?? ** I mean come on, Charlie Circus, Iceman, Adventure Island and the likes???? Haha. Happy because I know I have a lot of “easy” games to play with. Wahaha!!

So when it was already my turn and I was playing Super Mario, my Kuya (older brother) came to me and presented me with an offer:

“Dang, bigay mo sakin pra bigyan kita ng 100up tapos babalik ko na sayo.”

Ohmigod. It’s the same cajoling my brother would use to me back then to take control of the player. Haha. They (he and my younger brother) know all these tricks when it comes to different games. And my full respect for my Kuya developed during this one time that one of our cousins Kuya Eli came to us. Kuya Eli was already in this final level of a certain game (I think it’s Ghostbusters if my memory serves me right) and he can’t seem to finish it. So I gave the Gameboy to my Kuya and after less than 5 minutes he was able to finish the game. That fast!! I was like WOW because I swear we didn’t own a Gameboy all our lives and I was sure Kuya hasn’t played of that game before.

But just like when we were children after he accomplished that trick of 100up or save me from a very hard gaming scenario with a very hard to beat "mother" (believe me these are just in light levels haha), they won’t give the thing back to me. How very cunning of them, haha!! 18 years ago, this matter would already be brought up to the attention of my mom through my hissy fits. Wahaha. But of course I can’t do that anymore, hehe. There were also times back then when I was resigned to keep it to myself because if they got reprimanded by Mam, I won’t be able to seek their help in advancing to the next level. Sigh, poor me for being the only girl among my siblings. Hehe.

When I was once again in control, I was like complaining already in Level 3 of Circus Charlie. Level 3, goodness!! “Ano ba ‘to ang hirap!!” Hahaha. Then more comments, “Wala ba tong skip to next level after game over?” when the game was finally over. Hahaha!! I’m such a moron, a philistine, when it comes to these things. Haha!! But in all fairness to me, the last game I got addicted to was that of Nokia's N95 Snakes (I hope Samsung forgives me just for the mere mention of the competitor :P). I blogged it here how I was able to finish all 37 levels in 7 days without any help. (Proud daw? Haha). But I heard games are so advanced these days ha?? You can search for tricks on the net. Nothing is really impossible with the information superhighway. But still, it won't present any challenge anymore no???

I can’t help but realize how electronic games were so simpler back then. The type wherein jumping into a ring of fire with a lion or monkeys (remember how your body used to go with the movement as though it’s gonna help? Haha) or breaking ice or saving the princess or feeding a growing snake would already make children happy and fulfilled. Unlike nowadays, games have become so violent (admit it) that some even resulted to violence such as a student in the US killing his whole class just to imitate what he sees in the games??? Sad, sad. :(

Also, today we're not those kids anymore who are worry-free and quarrel over something so inane such as turns in using the PC. We're already adults now dealing with complicated problems and living our busy schedules. I'm glad that this thing somehow gives us the chance to be back to our younger states. Like last night I had to be extra sweet to Lem to lend me the thing. Unsuccessful, tsk tsk!! That's the reason also why I don't wanna buy (although I'm really lusting) that same gadget in glossy pink shade to add to my pinkie gadget collections (Aaargh!). And just like how in the games they help me get out of difficult levels, I know that in real life my two brothers will just the same be there to extend their hand whenever their gorgeous sister needs it. (-,-)


** The last thing we had for our family games was the same Nintendo family computer. We didn't own any Gameboy, Playstation or anything of that sort.

A Misleading "Sad Love Story"

(Youngblood , Philippine Daily Inquirer) TODAY, I will attend an execution: my own. I will watch it with both eyes open and I will not cry. I will not break down just because the man I have loved since forever will marry someone else. I will watch him promise himself to a woman who will never love him like I have. I will watch them bind themselves to a vow I should have taken.

I have loved Oliver almost all my life. I have known him since I saved his six-year-old hide from a bully named Ricardo who wanted to rid him of his two yellowed front teeth. I was five at the time, but having grown with five older brothers and a hellion of a sister, ''Totoy Cardo'' was a piece of cake.

Oliver was so overcome with embarrassment at having a girl to protect his scrawny neck that from that time on he made it a point to be the rescuer, not the rescued. As time passed, muscles filled out this lanky frame and those two front teeth began to sparkle. He combs his hair, and he takes a bath daily now. In short, he has become a fine specimen of manhood.

The best part is, he lived up to his promise: he became my self-appointed guardian (well, I don't know if that's the best or the worst part). He was just always there, sticking to me like glue. It used to drive me nuts that he never let me out of his sight.

When I was 12, I ran from the infirmary on my way home. I had found out in the most humiliating way that I had become a woman: there was a big red stain on the back portion of my skirt. The jeers and the taunts followed me through the school corridors. Oliver dashed after me and offered to accompany me home. I declined, of course. He seemed to understand my discomfiture and promised to drop later with the things left in school. When I reached home I was told that I needed to jump three times on the stairs (which I did) and to wash my face with my blood (which I didn't do). Oliver dropped by in the afternoon, sporting a black eye and a bruise on his arm. When I asked him what happened, he said he had walked into a closed door. I believed him. But a few days later, minus the dysmennorhea, I found out that Oliver got into fisticuffs because some guy made a disgusting remark about me.

Nobody had ever fought for me before that. And when you're 12 and discussing in class how King Arthur and fairest of them all, Lancelot, fought for Guinevere's love, you tend to get ideas. I loved Oliver then. When we were in high school and I found out that the school's heartthrob and one of my most ardent suitors, Richard, was involved with a bustier girl, it was to Oliver that I ran. When I didn't graduate as valedictorian and I got so drunk, it was Oliver who took me home. He didn't even mind that I barfed all over his dad's car (which he borrowed without permission).

When I decided to go to UP and he went to Ateneo, we celebrated by partying. When I lost my mom in a car accident, he took care of everything.

When my dad followed my mom less than a year later after a heart attack, he was there again. By this time he was an appendage of my life. He used to check out the guys I came to know. Nobody dared to get serious with me--not when Oliver had a black belt.I didn't know how to define our relationship. I didn't know what we were. We definitely were more than friends, better even than best friends. It was like we were a couple, but formally not one.

We did all the things that couple did like hang out and neck but always stopped when things got too hot. Since we never defined what we meant to each other we never said ''I love you'' or whatever serious couple told each other.

As a result, I remained a chaste princess while my prince caroused and sowed wild oats, but still had the energy to monitor my movements. I didn't mind.

After all, I was so sure we'd end up together. I always thought that in the end, it would be us. I loved him. I managed to convince myself that he loved me (what else could it be?). Little did I know that love doesn't conquer all, it only conquers the weak.

I didn't think he'd be so stupid as to get a girl pregnant on the same night they met at a party. I didn't think he'd be so stupid as to forget to use some form of contraception. After all, he had given me a lecture on safe sex. And I didn't think he'd be so stupid as to marry the girl. But maybe I forgot that after all he was a man, and men have been known to be stupid about these things. Their brain is located in a region other than between the ears.

What could I do? Kicking him in the groin and punching him in the eye seemed like a good idea then. Don't blame me; he was the one who enrolled me in a self-defense course. But I did not feel better. Seeing him bent over in pain only made me angrier. I wasted my life for this lousy excuse of a man? I could not believe it! I wanted nothing more than to run to him and beg him to wake me up from the stupid dream. I wanted him to take me some place where we didn't know anybody.

No pain, no memory, no humiliation. I wanted to just forget it ever happened but since I flunked in the School for Martyrs, I couldn't, for the life of me pretend, it didn't happen. I couldn't pretend he didn't hurt me. I couldn't pretend everything was fine and dandy and exactly the way it was before. We didn't talk for a month. For both of us who were practically inseparable, that was like an eternity. I ducked into corners whenever I would see him. I wouldn't take his calls. I wouldn't see him. And for some time hate was my reason for getting up in the morning, for breathing, for living.

Hate and I became good friends.

"God brings men into deep waters, not to drown them but to cleanse them," somebody once wrote. I didn't want to be cleansed. I just wanted to drown in pain and misery and utter desolation. I wanted to wallow in the dark and deep pit of despair. I know a thousand and one cliches that say this can be a blessing and that I should be thankful. But thankful is the last thing I'm feeling right now. I've always thought that there are three kinds of women: those who break, those who mend and those who are broken themselves.

Before this hit me, I assumed that I belonged to the first or second category. Now I know I'm in the third--so hurt and broken up inside. My grandmother used to say that there is nothing you can do about pain when it gives you a silly grin except grin right back. All I could manage was a wry smile, a killer headache and the worst hangover the day before his wedding.

Evidence of that is the disgusting sight of mashed potatoes and barbecue, thrown up not three meters away from where I was lying prostrate on the floor and the awful stench of cigarette on my hair. Frankly I don't want to go. I want to wallow in misery in my messy room, crying, retching and stinking, surrounded with Michael Learns to Rock (whose songs are dedicated to the broken-hearted) CDs. But I have to go and attend the wedding. I have to bathe and prepare and put on that atrocious peach (it's not even my color!) gown.

I'm not doing it for the groom, my one true friend and love, Oliver. Neither am I doing it for the bride, my younger sister, Sandra who needs me. I'm doing it for my unborn niece who has the great fortune of having me as her aunt. Call me stupid, but I've always known my place. If it isn't beside the man I was destined to marry, if it isn't behind my sister, who will take his name, wear his ring and bear him a child, then it must be with my niece, cradled close to my heart so that she will know both of our love.

If you, like me, received this story right down below an UTTERLY looong thread of tos and froms with personal reactions of sad, sniffs, =,( and something like those in between (not to mention the signatures of the sources of each mail), then most likely you are bound to feel the same thing. After reaching the end I was like “Ouch”. Losing a guy to another girl is one thing but giving him up to your sister no less is another. But when I was back to talking about the post to my friend, I was firm with my sentiments. She maybe hurt but still, ang tanga nya noh? (She’s a stupid right?) I always believed in fighting for the person you love - a cause that didn’t deter me from doing even if my first and only attempt before was unsuccessful. Anyways, this is not about me. And also, I was wrong with the way I looked at things.

So since it was an interesting – enticing even - story, I decided to forward it to my friends. Good thing that somebody shed to me some light on this situation. It was none other than my dear friend Tytana. Her reaction the whole time was like, “Duh??” She presented me with 2 plausible ideas: (1) The guy wouldn’t marry the girl if he isn’t in love with her and (2) It’s impossible for the guy not to know the sister of her childhood best friend.

I reread the whole thing and I was like, “Yeah you’re right! Why haven’t I thought of that?” I don’t know for others but even if my best friend is not a guy, I know her WHOLE clan enough and this saying from the fact that we’ve just known each other for only a sum of 3 years now. I mean, what more if you’re friends since 5??? Goodness!!

I’m trying to be open-minded on this story. Probably not knowing the sister can be a possible thing (God knows how) but there’s really something offensive in here. Whether it was already a secret affair going on even before (as what we suspect) or that she’s just really a poor victim of the whole thing, I can only feel hatred for how she delivered her piece. Gosh, we don’t even know if this is a true-to-life experience (according to the source it was published on the Daily Inquirer). But really, what does she expect us to do?? Be proud of her just because she’s doing it for the sake of her NIECE?? Give her a round of applause for being brave in attending the wedding?? It’s STUPIDITY - Boba, Tonta, Moron, Stoo-fid, Imbecile, Shunga-Shunga in many forms). I’m sorry; she just wouldn’t get any of that from me. Haha!! Tyts and I were even making fun of it:

kc: NAINIS tuloy ako sa kasal
tytana: para daw sa pamangkin!!
kc: so feeling nya she's doing it for a honorable cause
tytana: duhhhhhh
kc: EH BOBA CYA!!
tytana: oo
tytana: feeling heroic sya!!!!!!!!!!
kc: onga
kc: DUH???!!!
kc: hahaha
kc: nagalit
kc: GUSTO NYA ILAGAY KO CYA SA LIMANGDAANG PISO DAHIL SA GINAWA NYA
kc: MUKHA NYA!!!
kc: BKA GUSTO NYA ILIBING KO CYA NG BUHAY SA LIBINGAN NG MGA BAYANI
kc: BWAHAHAHAHA
kc: hahahahahaaha

Some words were violent but it was just meant to have fun alright?? And more convo:

tytana: maganda ang pagkakasulat i must say
kc: onga eh..now i know..
kc: ANG MGA KATULAD NYA, HINDI KINAKAAWAAN
kc: yes prang linya lng ng movie
kc: wahaha
tytana: hahahahahahahha
tytana: pasulat sulat pa sya ano
tytana: hindi na lang sya magisip muna
tytana: pagisipan nya ang nangyari
kc: eh gusto nya BAYANI cya eh..
tytana: dapat nga syang malagay sa 25 cent coin
kc: un na ba ung pinakamaliit??
kc: ung ano naman ung my butas sa gitna
kc: mas bagay cya dun
kc: nyahahaha
tytana: hahahahaha
tytana: 5 cents ata
tytana: ahhahahaha

Hay, ang sakit sa bangs!! Wahaha. I don’t know for some of you but for me and Tyts, it seems that many have been misled by this story. It's not a sad love story, it's a repulsive one. If she really wants to do it for her niece, she didn't have to be a masochist and show up in the wedding day itself specially that there has been no indication of peace between her and the couple. Time heals all wounds and if it's for the niece per se then she could wait for the right time. Aargh, I'm getting tired of this. It's sickening. :P